When is it over?

When you are in a long relationship, you get used to the person you are with that sometimes we get too comfortable. Too comfortable that we lose track of the intimacy and romance. We never think of losing our partners because we have been with them for a long time; and yet the opposite is quite true. We are slowly losing them. Even the very basic "i love you" gets lost. Everything is such a routine that nothing is so special anymore. 

At some point tho, it will just hit one of partners. One will wake up sad and start to question, is this what a relationship really looks like? The other will still go on, thinking everything is fine and where it should be.

How sad. Even talking is just a temporary fix as we go back doing the same shits again. Ahh, when no one is feeling special, important and loved anymore, when do we say it is over?

Burning Out

any given profession/job accompanies a certain stress, with that stress comes a certain tolerance we can handle. Once we reach a threshold, it gets harder to find a balance and peace of mind. Know your limits and what you can handle. when you are already presenting with symptoms of burning out, take a day to rewind and fill yourself that much needed positive energy. Remember, if you're not yet alright, you cannot do your job properly. Take a day, take a moment, have a laugh, have a good cup of coffee...do whatever it is to take care of yourself .

Dream About You

I dreamt about you tonight. No malice Just you and me having fun. We laughed and talked all night; i invited you to sleep over as it is too late to go home. You taunted my dirty room but never really hesitated to stay. We laughed and talked still like it was never really late.

They say your dreams reflect your inner desires. Yes, I do miss you and I want to be your person, your best friend. It just scares me to be close with someone as they always do leave me afterwards. Do not be fooled with my actions because it is exactly the opposite.

To the Mistress

I have so many inappropriate profanity to say but i wont say it because I will never stoop to any level I will later regret. Although, I might add, you both deserved every bit of it If I were to say them. The sad part is I actually thought you were a decent human being, Never in my wildest dreams have I ever thought you two would cause me this tremendously awful feeling. For awhile I thought of myself as a paranoid but you know what I was right the whole time! Perks of being a nurse, my only mistake was that I forced myself to blindly trust the one I love. You know I do not want to blame, I know I played a part as to why this all happened, however it is not an excuse for all this act. So many things can be done first before having the end result. I needed to send you this message regardless of how it will make you feel because whatever you feel right now, I am 100x more hurt and devastated. So, there I said it. 

Day Before the Storm

I am unhappy. I didn't feel appreciated. I am tired of doing most of the things at home. I am tired of doing all the thinking most of the time. I am tired of not feeling loved or cared for. 

Why should i have to tell someone how to treat me, how to love me? Or even beg for love making to happen. 

Its not the sex, it's a little bit of everything and a whole lot of nothingness. 

We are not what we were before but i must admit i miss how you treated, looked at and loved me. I know it is bad to compare but you told me you will never change even if i get used to all that. 

What happened to us.

Inhibitions and Skiing

Life is like skiing on a very steep hill, no matter how scary it looks like, you have to keep calm, look ahead and keep the weight on your heels. Have a little bit of faith and just let go. Be free. No inhibitions just pure carelessness and bliss.

Attraction 101

That feeling you get when you stare at someone and start to realize how madly attractive they are. 

They talk with such intelligence and even though you cannot comprehend it fully at times, their very thought process intrigues you.

How positive energy they emit to you that you just feel warm and secure.

Maybe being with you made me realize how much we are alike in some ways and so much more. 

And how I can fall intensely in love with you if I am not too careful.